Monday, January 30, 2012

How did you know he was the one?

The question that people always ask me is how did you know he was the one?"  For a variety of reasons, this question does not actually make sense. Primarily, as is, it poses something unanswerable. The only definition of how" that would be fitting in the context of this question reads by what means." So to rephrase the question, by what means did you know that he was the one?" I am not a psychic. This leaves me with one possible answer: I didn't know that he was the one.
 I think that the more relevant question is, What did you know on the day that you got married?"

A short list of things I knew on August 13, 2011:
  • I had to turn down acceptance to my number one choice for graduate school in Fort Collins, CO to be with Owen in Iowa City.
  • I did not want to live in Iowa.
  • The divorce stats regarding people who get married straight out of college don't bode well.
  • No one knows me better or appreciates me more than Owen.
  • Owen and I complement each other well; my weaknesses are his strengths and vise versa.
  • We are equals in our relationship. I may not be able to give you a strict definition of what I mean by this, but we both believe it to be true on emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and practical levels.
  • Our relationship is the number one priority for both of us.
  • Despite my qualms surrounding marriage at such a young age, barely 22, I had no doubts that I wanted to marry Owen. My desire to marry him was the single strongest desire that I have ever had.
  • The fact of not being married made me irrationally sad.
  • Owen loves me as much as I love him.
Our marriage was inevitable. I didn't choose to marry Owen, but at some undefined point we fell into marriage.